I read your post to MP. Do you think I should tell my W that I don't want a D and that I am willing to work on the M? How could I do that w/o appearing that I am begging or weak
Hurt, you have already told her you don't want the M to end and you want to work at it. She responded by saying she wants a mediator. There is your answer.
At this point, you do need to show confidence in yourself by not letting her dictate the rest. If she wants a D, give it to her. Do not hold onto her for dear life if she wants out. That is not confident, that is desperate and clingy.
It seems to be she is already responding to your "leading" by this example here:
Originally Posted By: hurtinhartford
I responded back an hour or two later and said, "Okay, I agree. I want you to be happy and I deserve to be with someone who wants to be with me." She asked me twice if I was okay with that.
The next morning I emailed her and suggested that we use a Mediator. And so I sent her an email telling her that I met with my L gave him the pre-nup and he will draw up papers then I asked who is her lawyer.
Then she emailed me last night asking me if we should use a Mediator or should she get her own L. So that is where I am at this point.
It may not seem like it, since your are inside the sitch but from the outside looking in, it's clear she is responding to you taking action. Even if the end result is a D, you are handling it well.
True story: long long ago, I was dating a guy and decided to end things after awhile since I didn't feel that "spark" was between us. When I ended it, he just said "Ok," and that he understood.
To this day, I am still impressed and kind of happy with the way he handled it. There was such a level of confidence and gracefulness with the way he handled it it. I honestly think everyone should handle a break up that way.
