Perhaps the truth is that M is not really for those who don't truly value it anyway. If the wayward wants to throw in the towel, it's usually for very selfish reasons beyond their spouse's ability to sway in any event. Might as well let them go. It is only if the WAS still has an active conscience and a sense of honor that they will turn around from their path anyway -- which, sadly, explains why so few reconcilliations happen after all.
If we cannot honor the wee, small voice within and adhere to our convictions, then a M is doomed anyway. And with the siren call of weak moral accountability in our post-modern culture, most folks struggle with the very meaning of commitment. "Guilting" them is thus pointless anyway. You cannot "guilt" someone who has lost their sense of shame in the first place. We are really talking about a disease of the spirit here that has as one symptom all these broken M's.
