Our relationship did become boring as with everything going on, she was always tired. I was very sympathetic and never pushed her. I never knew the effects low self-esteem had on relationships and the high failure rate because of it. Throw anxiety or depression into the mix and disaster is looming.
One thing she said in one of her last emails was that I had no life. Found that odd as my life was more busy in the last year than ever before. The busier I became, the more the sarcastic comments came my way. But I made it a point that our time together was never affected by it.
She is such a wonderful lady but as she is so private, I doubt she will ever seek help. Over the years I have also learned that she is not open to suggestions from others.
I also relied too much on her for my happiness. I'm sure when she wasn't happy she turned to me. On days when I saw her, I could tell how her day went the minute I walked in the door. On the bad days, things became very tense and I'm sure I projected that.
But I did get away from the things that made me happy. More of a money issue as one of the things she enjoyed was to be wined and dined. Gets expensive doing it once a week. Now I have the money and started playing golf again, started taking ballroom dance lessons and cooking classes.
Problem is, she has no way of seeing any changes I make. Remember that actions speak louder than words. Guess I will hope for a miracle.
