She then asked me if she should call before coming and I said no.
Normally I do not promote this approach but in your case Bobby I think it may be warranted. She has left the house - I would ask her to call before she comes over. It is no longer her house. She has decided to leave the martial home - not you. In my mind - she is now a visitor.
Bobby - maybe I am wrong here but what I see in you is a man that really does not like conflict. A man that thinks that he can just be nice to her and that she'll just come around. Bobby I have been there. I have tried to manipulate a situation by being nice. I sat around and thought...oh...this is a 180 for me...yes...if I do this or that..she will see that I am being nice and remember just how much she loves me. Bobby - none of it worked.
Do you know what works?
Let her go completely - let her go now.
Begin to write down a list of things that you want to do for YOU
Begin to live your life as if she is never coming back.
Bobby - i am not saying be an as*hole. No. What I am saying is that the nicer you are too her...willing to help..willing to help her with this or that....the more she just may get the sense that you are okay with this.
Think about it...
God Bless, Eri
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
