cheated on, lied to, and now I am moving on

[awest1217]

NM - H and his brother do not get along, but his brother was there for S while H decided to go MIA so I try to talk to him once in a while. He and I get along really well. I wouldn't say we are friends, but we get along. H seemed jealous because I was talking to some of his family without his knowledge and it was his brother so also a little jealous that his brother would get to see S. I don't know why but he was acting jealous.

CTH - I am ok with being friends when it comes to H. It really doesn't bother me, and I still have to work on the part where I want him to have consequences, but mostly I have forgiven him and I don't care what he does with his life as long as it doesn't affect S. When it does affect S, it better be something that is going to last.

Well in new developments, I was putting together S's race track from H and I found some long pieces of blond hair attached to some of the pieces. No one at H's parents house has blond hair. They all have dark hair, but FIL who has short white hair. I am the only blond, but there it was. So I asked S what he did with H. (H and I agreed that S should not be around any significant others unless it was serious, and then we would tell the other parent so they are aware). I asked if he just played with daddy or if other people were there. He said daddy's friend came over and she forgot the extra wii mote. S wouldn't say that unless it was true. I asked who it was and he didn't remember. I asked when she was there and he didn't get into specifics so I don't think she was there very long (probably when S was taking his nap), but I don't know. I care that she was there a little, but I have prepared myself for this so it is more that H wouldn't tell me. I really want to be honest with H and do things like the birthday dinner or other little things together, but we won't be able to if H is leaving things out on purpose. I won't be a partner even as a parent for that and it will make me just say we won't do things together except to politely talk at pick-up and drop-off. I am not asking for him to tell me about his life. I just want to know who is around S. Who is a part of his life. When/If I have a relationship where the significant other and I get serious and he meets S, I would tell H because I feel H needs to know who is in S's life.

I asked H about it and said he didn't know what S was talking about. I didn't bring up the hair, but I know he is lying. Someone was there, who is the question. S knows OW so he would have said "OW", but I just don't know. I did text H to get it off my chest that I do expect honesty. I don't care about what he does with S, but I expect to be told the truth about who is a part of S's life just like I would extend the same curteousies (sp) to him if that ever happens with me. In order for this arrangement to work, we can't have S having to watch what he says or for me to 2nd guess things. I just want to be honest all the time about S. The rest of his life...I don't care.