You are trying so hard to save your M and I know what that is like. Your are spinning. You are doing everything that you can. You are searching for a majic bullet. You are looking externally for your answers....
You are scared... You are angry...
I get it. I have been there. I lived in fear for a very long time. I hurt myself emotionally because I did not do ONE thing....
DO you know what that ONE thing is?
I did not love myself.
Yep - I did not. I thought that my wife was the only person in the world that defined me. I did not know who I was.
Then....i began to realize something...I began to realize that NONE of US can control another. I began the long process of looking INWARD - instead of outword. I began to realize that to love means that sometime you will feel pain. It is what you do with this pain that matter most.
You 2G WILL SURVIVE.
You want your H back...you have tried everything. If there was something I could do, something anyone could do - trust me they would do it. Your H is responsible for HIS actions. Your H is on his own journey - you MUST now go on yours.
What is this journey that I talk about?
Is it the one where YOU 2G get to find out what you are made off. It is the one where YOU 2G begin to find yourself again. It is the one 2G where you get to find who YOU really are OUTSIDE of ANY relationship. It will be the most important journey of your life if you choose to take it.
SO how do you start this journey?
You let GO. Period. You begin the process of accepting that you must first take care of YOU and your baby before you can take care of another.
2G - letting go will be the hardest thing that you will need to do. THe hardest. From this thought YOU will emerge.
A few other things that I want you to think about....
DO you want your H back because HE feels it is HIS "responsbility" OR
DO you want your H back because HE wants to come back. HE wants to be with YOU?
Who get's to make that choice? You or Your H?
You know where to reach me....your call BUT let me be honest - I do not have the magic pill to give your H.
GOd Bless, ERic
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
