[hoosiermama]

I'm really, really afraid that as they age, Themselves are going to compare my relative (lack of) wealth endowment, and the way they live with me, to STBX and whomever she happens to be with at the time -- and I will always come up short.

I've had a similar fear; probably, many of us have. xH's current soulmate grew up wealthy, remains wealthy; gets along swimmingly with xH's millionaire brothers and their families. They just returned last evening from a 2-week jaunt along the East Coast, visiting the soulmates friends and family (and I anticipate likely got engaged while out there). What do I have to offer D14, I've wondered--not even working right now, can't afford to call a plumber so D14 has enough hot water to shower here at home, 2 years' worth of financial crisis....but where would she rather be? yes--here with me. she feels like "a black sheep" when she's with her wealthy cousins, enjoys the stories of world travel from soulmate and her family but doesn't feel connected to them. She is well aware that xH treats her like a toy to be enjoyed until he's had enough, then sending her back to me; life would be complete if he just didn't have to communicate with me at all or provide that whopping 5% of his income in child support; he's happy, I struggle constantly. but this is her home, this is where she's a priority, and she knows that.

so will Themselves.