Still trying to find my way

[Mystik]

Thanks NM, it is hard to stay dark. DS will say or do something funny and I want to share it with H, but have to remind myself if he hadn't left us he would have seen/heard it himself so why should I share private moments with DS with H? If that makes any sense.

H's text got me wondering if DS does miss his father but doesn't say anything. So I asked him this morning if he misses Daddy. His answer: "Not one bit." Needless to say I'm not going to be the one to break that news to H, he'll accuse me of making it up. Let him ask DS and get the honest answer.

Had to see H this morning for him to pick up DS for a Sunday visit. I was good, didn't speak to H at all, just told DS I loved him and would see him later. H ended up calling me to see if DS had eaten breakfast, I simply answered he had refused every time I offered him food and ended the call. Trying my best to continue staying dark. I'll have to see him in a few hours to pick up DS then dark until Wednesday night.