W prolongs the event with the good by a million times I love you a million times. The more w hangs around and says I love you the harder it is for me connect with D8
Yes, I know the type very well. It doesn't have to be a S to be like that! I can almost assure you that your W is saying things to D8 that is very negative about you and discouraging D's being at your place.
My advice is simply this: If you are to drop the girls off at mom's without any visual or physical contact....then the same should go for her. She needs to either have someone to intervene with dropping the girls off at your place or else work something out where mommy is not there when the "drop-off" is made. (Gosh, what a horrible term....drop-off. Sounds more like a kidnapping!) Maybe she could take the girls to a friend or relative, then she leaves, then you pick them up. I doubt they would be so emotional if moms not with them. The reason D5 is such a champ, is b/c she younger and mother hasn't been able to sway her. Believe it! I know how these women think!
IMO, you need to have a boundary about this very thing (dropping the girls off) and you need to know how to enforce a consequense for W if she doesn't respect this boundary. Think about it and what she could face that would not be desirable for her, if she did not respect boundary.
Last edited by sandi2; 09/11/1011:25 PM.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
