Should I move to the spare bedroom or not?

[rb1967]

Thanks again eeyore and Allen. When i was just lurking the boards before I saw where people said they made mistakes and now I know exactly what they are talking about. I also know myself-want things to be right so I think in that haste I get off kilter.
I am definitely going to step back-I finally realized that today. That’s why I asked about the bedroom thing. Tomorrow I am going out with some girlfriends-which is something I havent done in years. Its my birthday.. I am never out of the house at night. I think my predictability may have made him think I didn’t have a life and I am boring. Probably right about the no life thing. I always made an effort to be home when he is home.

Eeeyore-to answer your question about where does he stay when he is not here. I dont know. He works until 11:00pm and then he comes home at 4:00am- then that started to turn into 5 or 6 am. That’s how the whole thing started and got the ball rolling. I went with the 4 for a while and tried to get him to reassess why he thought that that was acceptable. I didn’t want to accuse him of anything because of his past. Trying the benefit of the doubt. I KNOW he is sleeping somewhere cause before I said anything I monitored whether or not or how late he slept the next day. Since he told me he was clubbing. This is a large city so there are afterhours clubs. Again, couldn’t figure out how someone could stay awake until 4 or 6 in the morning then get up at 9:00 go to work until 11 at night and repeat. Guess I know now. (hahaha-had to laugh)