My W was defintely an enabler she relied on me for so much during the initial phases of our relationship as well as through her nursing school that things got out of control...she allowed it and never set boundaries and I wasn't aware that she needed her space, thus, didn't stop it.
Sounds like you enabled her. You felt wanted and needed because she relied on you.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Glad you are at peace with your decision and moving on to what's best for you.
As for the recipes, you guys are good. I feel so inadequate when it comes to my cooking skills right now. Keep the recipes going though, I need some new arsenal for my dinners.
Doodi
"I feel like Rocky in the fifteenth round, beaten beyond recognition, when I realize, the only person I've been fighting for is...myself."
The frustration that I am feeling is that I feel like I am off the DB ride before I bought a ticket! I am GALing and having a great time and in the back of my mind I keep thinking...that it would even be that much better if my W was here.
She and we spent the last 6 months together getting her through her nursing school and preparing for the RN exam so weekend fun was sparse. Now that she is working and we have time we are not spending it together.
I feel like there is no chance to save the M if my W does not move. It is going on 10 weeks of NC. So do I have to prompt her eventually? Or just GAL away and allow the M to deteriorate to a big D? I am just frustrated and using the forum as a pressure relief valve.
I feel like there is no chance to save the M if my W does not move.
No you don't feel that. You feel hopeless maybe. You think there is no chance to save your marriage if your W doesn't move.
Communication lecture over now. What matters is that you are taking time to enjoy life and working on making your life better.
You can't put that on-hold for some event in the future that may or may not happen. You deal with the hand you have been dealt, and then you set out seeing if you can improve things generally in your life.
Start making a list of 10 things that make you feel grateful. Do this every day until life starts gettin better. If you don't have a fitness routine, establish one.
Last edited by TimeHeals; 09/11/1005:47 PM.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
I have been working out and building my self esteem up. I am beginning to think that I would be better off pushing the D button on this M. At least I wouldn't have this whatever it is hovering over my head and I would be leading rather than waiting for her to make a move.
At least she would have to talk to me (a little and possibly face me) and not avoid, procrastinate, sweep it under the rug, wait to get her big girl panties on....whatever she is doing. I feel like I am waiting for the other shoe to drop.....and why am I?
