Quote: Mrs. Puppy did not have the universal vacant, dead-eyes appearance of an MLCer. Hence the distinction between a straightforward affair and MLC affair.Is this the only requirement for her not to have been in a MLC? When I read the story it sounds like a MLC to me. The timing of the affair busting was perfect for breaking it up and putting her into depression withdrawal stage. Perfect boundaries. But she was still in a MLC to me. A roller coaster of events. Ups and downs, coming closer, distancing. Hormones out of wack. A perfect storm. Don't know about the childhood issues. Or the trigger event. But the actions seem just like a MLC.
The end result, also is something I question. After the affair is busted, what happens then? What is the end game? Is that like the end game in the six stages of MLC?
Oh my...questions, questions. Let me try to address them one by one.
Is this the only requirement for her not to have been in a MLC?
I am basing my information on Puppy's comments throughout the site here and there. I have not read up on his threads of his sitch. However, based on some comments around the site, it appears that Mrs. Puppy did not have the "lost puppy" look or affect that is the universal signpost of a MLCer. Nor do I see any indication of a trauma in Mrs. Puppy's case. And Puppy busted the affair in 3 months and they reconcilled shortly thereafter. The classic signposts and timeline does not mesh with MLC in Mrs. Puppy's case. It is only my perspective.
After the affair is busted, what happens then?
1) Reconcilation 2) Divorce
Whatever path that occurs after an affair ends (busted or MLCer "wakes up"), there's been a tremendous trial of pain, anger, betrayal, sadness left it its wake. Not for the faint of the heart.
What is the end game?
Only you know the answer and it is an individualistic choice. Ultimately, the true end game per se is your own personal growth and accumulating knowledge and self-awareness about relationships in general from DBing. To me, that is success.
