Anger is a natural feeling in all of our situations. Channel the energy it gives you into something productive. Easier said than done, I know.
None of us here are completely to blame, or blameless. And to be honest, focusing on the past is pointless. You're here. Pick a direction on your personal compass and GO.
The only time I think it's worth focusing on the past is in counseling, particularly MC. I think it's essential for us to both hear our spouses, as well as say what we feel; this often means dealing with stuff from the past.
But reacting to your anger by blaming yourself is simply suppressing your anger over your sitch. It'll resurface eventually, so deal with it now.
