This is all crazy but it does make me worry that she might try to use this to get the divorce. The only reason it concerns me is because we have the other daughter and she might try for full custody. . . .
. . . She also informed me that the only way she would sign the loan modification to save the house is if I signed her divorce papers. She wants out so bad that she is making up bogus reasons and trying to black mail me into it.
I told her that if that is the real reason, that I didn't realize it and that every time the issue of the SD came up in our mariage I have done everything I could to try to change things. I can admit that I have made mistakes as a parent and husband over the years but I have constantly adjusted and changed for the better as I learned how to be a father/husband.
. . .She told me that it couldn't be fixed and that i needed to give her the divorce...
. . . She then proceeded to threaten me by saying that if this divorce cost her more than the 2500 dollar retainer that I would be paying for it. . . I have been trying not to play dirty or dig up anything because I am trying to stand on God's word that he can reconcile this however I don't want to be niave or let her try to hurt our DD in the process of these lies she is trying to say. I have been told not to waste money on an attourney until i am served with papers, but I don't want to get caught with my pants down in this fight.
Schmill,
Please try to re-read what I've pulled out of your post, above, and try to read it as a disapassionate observer, if you can. Say your brother wrote it, or your cousin, or a good friend. How would you advise them?
God doesn't believe in "playing Offense" when it comes to divorce. But He darn sure understands playing Defense. You need to protect yourself -- NOW. Get the baddest-ass, men's rights/paternal custody family law attorney you can find and afford, and PROTECT YOU AND YOUR CHILD. Personally, I think you should go for custody of your stepdaughter, too, but that's for you to decide.
Take her lightly, and she'll eviscerate you. She is Iran, and she's TELLING you what she's going to do to you, Israel. Underestimate her at your peril.
