I told my W weeks ago that I would attend a Sweet 16 party for her cousin. At this point I really don't want to go and my T tells me NOT to go. But there is a part of me that says that I made the commitment and I should just go. My thought was to take my own car and only stay for a short time and then go home.
Re: the call for seeing a mediator: I am not ready. I have too many questions to ask my W before I can go there. I will go, but when I am ready. I want to consult with an attorney first and know my rights and I have also sought out my own mediator (via my T) who I will want to see.
It bothers me that my W let a month-plus go by saying nothing and then calling me up all cheerful asking me to go meet with a mediator.
I want to be strong, I don't want to become the enemy because I will never stop fighting for my family. I know that this separation probably needs to happen for anything to change in our R, but I want to understand how to move forward and appear strong, confident, no longer a pushover, no longer the H who makes everything easy, someone who earns respect and someone who still gives the impression that he will always want his family.
I need to make changes. The status quo isn't working. What to do...
