This evening my wife stopped by the house without me knowing ahead of time. She said she did not have internet connection and asked if she could use my computer. My 2 daughters were also with her. They seemed to be happy to be at the house. I asked them if they were hungry because I had grilled chicken earlier.They said they ate. My wife went upstairs and did what she had to and I got a chance to see my daughters. They were at the house for 2.5 hrs. I went out shortly after they arrived and walked around the neighborhood. My wife began opening the pantry door an refrigerator and had a few snacks. My wife asked if she could come by tomorrow while I am away to catch up on schoolwork.She told me she was overwhelmed and I told her she could do it and just take one day at a time. I was cordial but distant to my wife. I do believe she misses the house and ? even me. I had not seen or spoken with her in a week. The journey continues. Bobby O
Hi Bobby, you are doing well. Careful about this ^^^ smells a lot like mind reading/setting yourself up for heartache with expectations.
IMO, you sound like you are focussing on being dark/dim as a tactic to get your wife to miss you. Detaching and going dim are to protect you emotionally.
Peace PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
PEI is correct but you can fake it until you make it!
Absolutely, in fact it's necessary, but you have to know you are "faking it" ... or you won't know you're actually working towards something bigger ...
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
Just dropping in to say that you are doing good. The one comment I would like to make is this....
What I see in your post is that you still are "looking" at W. You are still "looking" at how she may feels. You are still "looking" at what she may be thinking.
True healing will come when you stop looking and just let be.
Maybe Bobby instead of looking at her YOU should be looking at you.
For example - What long term goals/plans to YOU have for Bobby?
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Hey Eric, I am learning a lot from you all. Yesterday I had 2 more surprise visits. I just stayed distant but cordial. My wife has exams coming and she is stressed out. I have to work this morning and then I will volunteer at my daughters ballet studio. I am starting to look at me and think I understand what you mean and what this is about. I wish I could meet all the wonderful people who have helped me on this site and buy them a drink and dinner. Love you guys. Bobby O
