My New LBS Reality

[irishblessings]

Thanks Lin - I am so grateful to you for sharing your experiences and giving me hope.

Today was a 90% good / 10% bad day. The 10% was really my projecting my hurt and insecurity on an email H sent. He sent S and I an email with S's progress report and a note that said "Looks like you are off to a great start - keep it up!" I projected the things that H has said to me - "kids will be fine / I'll be a better parent / better employee / better son, etc." I felt like - "oh look, all is good because son is doing well in school - all is good. He has had little if any contact with S about anything other than basketball. S moved from honors to college prep this year to get his GPA up in hopes to get sports scholarship. Who is feeding, clothing, sheltering S? Who gets him up in the morning? Who reminds him to take his asthma medication - gets his sports clothes - checks his homework - gets his school supplies? And I LOVE doing every ounce of it. My vent here is just that H has abandoned his responsibility but tries to serve as a cheerleader of how life is great! It felt like a knife in my heart. I did not respond to H. I just closed my office door for a few minutes, teared up, and talked myself down. I know I'm lucky that he even "cheers" for son. But it still irked me.

Rest of the day - PRODUCTIVE!!!! I slept well, got up, caught up in my office - came home - cleaned like crazy - and am ready for the weekend. I begged off my middle D's football game (she's a college dancer) - just want to finish getting caught up. Also, next weekend is the weekend of my 25th wedding anniversary and the kids and I are headed to Nashville. I'm putting together a photo story of the good times.

I am so grateful for this board - to be able to start my day and end my day with this interaction is so cathartic. Thank you to all who listen and advise.