Not sure where to start or end, WAW - #2

[john28]

Well, who the hell was it then? It sure wasn't me.

What does this even mean?

In regards to my panic attack, I don't think you understand what it's like. I've only had a mild one before compared to the one 2 days ago. I was in panic for over an hour. You have zero control over your body and emotions, you are going in and out of hyperventilation, and you are saying all kinds of stuff in between. I had zero control over anything, it felt like I was dying from the inside out. Ask anyone who's had one, they probably feel the same.

What was it that you told her during your panic attack? That you weren't going to pay for her seperation? That she needed to get a job?

That stuff is all true.

I am trying to understand. Really, I am.

No, I didn't say those things. I asked her to come home, to stop this, to be with me, to love me, to hold me, all the crap you aren't supposed to say. Then it turned into OMG how could you do this, you don't understand, why would you do this to someone you loved, I can't believe you are this person, etc.

It was a lot of blame, and she didn't like it.