Going home......................

[brandnewday]

I have to make this short and sweet as I just found out I have to pick up the kids early from school today...Blech!

I can only write from experience.

I tried to read every single book about MLC that I could find. Somewhere there is a thread that Snodderly had listed some really great books.

I know that when I was acting like the B*tch from hell, and trying to control my Husband's actions, contacting OW, letting everyone know about how my Husband was carrying on, and forsaking his marriage vows, nothing seemed to change.

I contacted the OW's Husband, I snooped, I did everything I could to expose my Husband's affair.

I also had no clue about MLC or what it was.

I learned very quickly that everything I was doing was totally arse backwards.

I sought IC and came here to seek wisdom and help.

I set boundaries and tried to detach from the insanity.

I was also a slow learner and it took me a good 18 months post bomb to really learn the art of detaching.

The advice I have to offer is from my experience and from what I have learned since my Husband came home.

He has shared things with me since he has been home that only confirms some of the good things I learned here.

Whether or not MLC is the problem boundaries are so important. They are for you, not WAS.

I learned how to turn off my phone and stop worrying that I would miss his calls.

If he was rude to me and started one of his spewfest's I would let him know that he could call me back later when he had calmed down, and I would turn off my phone.

I don't think that there is anyway to "fix" a MLC or make it end sooner, BUT I do think we can prolong it if we badger them and harass them and keep wiping the s*it in their faces.

Better run, or I will be late,

Blessings
BND