I'd have to agree with Eric, that there's a huge difference between exposing a regular affair and an MLC affair. I did not expose my H's MLC EA, partly because infidelity was so opposed to his behaviour when not depressed that it seemed more respectful in the long term not to throw his dirty laundry in everyone's face.
While he was in his MLC he constantly and nastily criticized my family and friends to me, or avoided them, so not exposing has made it so much easier for a loving relationship between them to be reestablished.
Also, perhaps most importantly, although my children had to put up with spew, absenteeism and neglect for the MLC years, they never had to deal with the knowledge of their father's infidelity. Research indicates that the daughters of MLC men often become OW in adulthood in an unconscious bid to redress the wrongs they were powerless to change as children--no matter how much they hated their father's affair at the time. I'm glad my daughter will never have to know about that part of her father's life, unless later events in her life require me to explain to her about MLCs, and how they can happen to good people.
