who is that little Brooklyn girl standing in our doorway and why is she holding that bat?
This made me laugh out loud B ... someday I'll tell ya about the night I ran 4 hooligans out of our front yard with a baseball bat ... while J slept peacefully in the bedroom (funny thing is it didn't even cross my mind to wake him - I just handled it!)
PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
Hey B - I could have sworn I just saw someone holding a bat walking in front of the house. Was that you?...short, dark hair with high heels - LMAO. Seriously - thank you for the support.
Grit - I would wear the beaver T-shirt but I left it at your house...opps...maybe I shouldn't have said that. LOL
PEI - Thanks sweetie.
Mach - Words can't say it....I could not even try to describe it..You know...thank you.
All
I feel good today. A little sad but I feel really strong. I have some things bouncing around my head in terms of what I WANT that I need to write down before the meeting.
I feel very calm...it is almost sureal. I believe that this just may be that moment...that time when you really realize that all of the work, all of the tears, all of the pain and all of the mistakes...brings you to this place. A place of peace. A place where you really realize just how far you have come. Where you realize just how much you have changed, just how much you have grown. A place where it does not matter who "sees" it, who "believes" it - you just know. You feel it. The fog is lifted. The hurt although still inside no longer controls your actions, your words. A place where the future does not look as dark, a place where HOPE always abounds, a place where when you look in the mirror - you smile.
I have thought about these boards, the people on these boards, the stories. I have seen a lot in the time that I have been here. A lot. I have seen people grown, people get stuck, people remain in anger and I realize....just what a heavenly place this is. I realize the love that many of you have. Thank you - thank you for allowing me here. Thank you for the encourgagment, thank you for the 2x4's, thank you for the challenges and thank you all for being YOU.
Strength - is defined not by what you say but rather by what you do.
Compassion - is a gift that keeps on giving.
Faith - Just believe that all things will work in the order and manner that they are suppose to work.
Love - The decision we all make, to remain true to who we really are. Love the feeling or actions that we take towards the people that have mattered and that we have cared for now OR in the past. You never need to stop loving someone. No. You only need to learn that YOU can never CONTROL the feelings of another - they are responsible for thiers you are responsible for YOUR.
Detachment - I can never stress it enough...this is the main ingredient for true healing. True growth. Something that we should NOT be afraid of. Never fear falling "out of love" - if you do then really maybe it was not true love to begin with.
Who YOU are - not a easy question to answer when you first arrive here. Then you begin to find it..you begin to realize so much about yourself. You being to realize that NO ONE is perfect - and guess what YOU do not have to be perfect - only YOURSELF. The life you live is yours. The actions you take are yours. LIve them and also accept the outcome/response to those actions.
So today is the day....
THe start of a process. I will react in a manner that is consistant with who I am (no Grit I will not curse at the lawyers). No - I will act with love, compassion, understanding and as the person I am.
I am not responsible for someone else's anger or issues I am not responsible for someone believe is what they believe is fair I am not respnsible for someone elses actions - Mine only.
I will be the man that I have become. AND I thank many of you for helping me get here.
God Bless, Eric
Last edited by ericmsant2; 09/09/1001:38 PM.
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
The negotiations can be delicate with some give and take.
My final negotiations were done at the courthouse prior to a status hearing. I stood in the hall while my L worked with my W and her L in a conference room (my W was a B according to my L). He came out to discuss with me a few times and it only amounted to me paying some back child support of $2400 as to their final wants. That was proabably how much it cost that day just for both L's to travel to and from the courthouse and spend time negotiating so I said yes and then we went before a judge who praised us for coming to a judgment on our own and said that our D would be final in a week or so. Using the court to decide would have been very costly and I am happy that both L's were very professional.
Hi Eric, I have done quite a bit of reading over the past weeks and it's my reading that has brought me here to your thread. I just had to come here to commend you for the time and energy you give in posting to others. You not only provide a wealth of support in your words but you also have the ability to ask the questions that promote others to reflect deeply. Your words and advice are testament to the person that you are, especially when you can be so giving in difficult times. Cas