You know Puppy, one thing I just realized reading your response. Not once has she said what she is willing to do to work on our marriage. The whole thing has been her deciding between me and the family and her lover. I have not heard her once say that she had a hand in what when wrong between us. I think I am tired of taking the blame for all of this myself!
I have made an appointment to get started in counseling. If for no other reason then for myself.
It sounds like you are on the right track....glad to see you realize you are not the only one to blame and she needs to take responsibility for her actions.
Originally Posted By: jammed
I did not think she was gay. That aspect still has me in a state of shock. I know that it makes me feel so completely inadequate as a lover. I know in my head that I should not feel that way, but it is hard not to think that I am so bad in bed that I sent her completely off of men.
DO NOT feel inadequate as a lover...no no no. This is not about you...this is about her. She is trying something new, exciting, "forbidden". There's a type of rush in it for her. I know it's hard to not internalize and it's hard to understand but don't you dare take the blame for it.
Me: 39 H: 39 S: 15 M: 18 years Bomb: 6/3/09 H moved out: 10/15/09 H moved back:5/30/10
