I do realize that since she's pulled the lawsuit trigger, it'll be that much easier for her to pull it again.
W e-mailed me and asked if I'd go to lunch with her next Monday to chat. I said ok.
After reading on another thread here, something occurred to me. W ocassionally exposes her guilt to me, and I'm not sure how to respond to it. I don't want to enthusiastically agree with her when she's showing me her guilt. What is the most constructive way to reply?
For example, back in the summer when we were in the middle of our reconciliation effort, we went to see fireworks with the kids. Some of my single friends were there, in fact it was the first time W met them, and she was clinging to me a bit out of nervousness. I felt good, and thought I was putting out a strong mellow vibe. Kids were having a great time, weather was awesome, fireworks were good, etc.
On the way out I passed by one of the older guys I work with, who was there with his wife. A really great guy. He had never met my W before, and knows nothing of my sitch (at least showed me I haven't been the subject of office rumor mill). He enthusiastically said hi, and we introduced each other to our wives. We had a brief friendly interaction, and as we walked away he said to my W something like "Hold onto him, he's a good man." Was nice to hear. She smiled at me and replied "I know."
After we walked a little ways, W was acting unsure, and asks "What was it like hearing your friend say that to me?" I just replied "It felt good." Then she said with a nervous joking tone "He obviously doesn't know the truth about me." I kind of chuckled in response, but didn't say anything.
What am I supposed to say to statements like that? It's becoming clear to me how guilty she feels, inside. She tries to fight it, but it leaks out. I felt like she wanted something from me, but I didn't know what to say. Humor is probably the right answer. Perhaps if I joked back "Nope, I've never told him that you leave the cap off the toothpaste" or something like that.
