I don't think I'm less receptive to him, I just think we both have changed our focus for right now.
Now I will admit to becoming more selfish and standing up for myself but it had to be done. He was sinking (albeit my fault) and was dragging me down too. I had to step up and say enough.
When the bomb was dropped in May, I asked him for a little space and patience. I didn't mention divorce or even separation, I just told him I had some things I needed to work through. I didn't stick to my judgment and let myself be drug into conversations and situations I wasn't ready to deal with. I told him things because I promised to be transparent and it backfired on me. I felt pushed and forced into making a decision I wasn't ready to make.
Now that it has been made I'm making the best of the situation. I feel more at ease because I am able to focus on the original problems. H feels better as well (or so he says) but I really can't explain why. For all I know he's DBing me...if it works why not right.
Doodi
"I feel like Rocky in the fifteenth round, beaten beyond recognition, when I realize, the only person I've been fighting for is...myself."
