That's a great technic to practise before walking through the door, wish I had asked this question months ago!
Last night was all polite and non-confrontational, she asked if I would be in tonight at 6.30 as she had to go somewhere, possibly to view a property?, not sure, but I'm trying to remember that is out of my control so I will not ask where she is going,etc.
She was on the phone when I walked down stairs in running gear and nearly fell off the sofa when I said I was going for a run!, big 180 from me there!!!
Got back in, she was still on the phone, just say "night" and went up stairs for a shower and bed, she slept in seperate room again, something else I have no control of.
I have an invite from works to a huge social event onFriday, something I know she would love, I have forwarded her the email invite this morning asking if she would like to go, not sure she will, but I have been polite and asked the question, I would like her to go but if she says no, I will go alone, no problems.
As to what I want from my marriage?, I have thought about it.
It was very intimate most of the time,we had sex most days before the situation deteriated, so I have no worries there.
She can be quite secretive about certain things, nothing major, but it could be to avoid any conflict with me, I would like her to be totally open, but my actions might be the reason behind it, not sure?
She is far too soft with the children though, which really gets to me,she knows it,and the kids totally play on it, then I step in, probably shout too much due the way she has acted and suddenly I'm the bad guy, I'm sick of being the bad guy to our kids, why should I be used as a threat to them, " behave or I'll tell your father", that gets to me!!
She is a good mother, but cannot cook, and has no interest in it, so the kids will get microwave chips and rubbish like that for dinner, I get in later so it's not as easy as me taking over the cooking, I do when I can, but its not always practical, when I say anything about that it's turned on to me not being there, I'm at work not sat in a bar somewhere!!!
I know I have to work on me and my faults to be a better person, husband and father, and I'm not going to let anything stop me from achieving it, if we split, I know I have contributed, by I faced my issues and addressed them, I will not walk away from my family, that's the easy option, move on forget, just carry on as you are, that will not help the situation or me.
