Not sure where to start or end, WAW - #2

[john28]

I called my W tonight and talked with her about today. I told her that I was thankful she was there to help me today, and I really appreciated it (I've done the same for her on Monday). I told her I was sorry she had to see me like that, but it wasn't me - something else had taken over my body and I really couldn't control anything.

She said no problem, that she's freaked out this week too. She thought that in some way it was expected, and it was somewhat healthy, otherwise all of this would mean nothing at all.

She really did come through for me today. She can be loving and caring when she wants to.

Retrouvaille is still on in 3 days. But she's made it crystal clear to me there is nothing I can say or do anytime soon to change her mind about going down the road of a legal S and possibly D. I don't know if Retrouvaille is good with her having that state of mind going in... I feel like it can't hurt, but maybe if we waited to a later date when things might be more amicable or good we could go then and it would have more of an impact than now - especially if she walks in there with this WALL of "under no circumstances will I come home." It might be pointless.