I was always supportive of my husband applying for better postitions within the company. I was the one who put his resume and cover letter together! My position at my work is very public. I am on the radio and TV all the time. I know that his friends and co-workers comment on it all the time, saying things like "how the hell did you get a woman like that?" they are just kidding with him but I think it wore down on him. He told my Board President that he couldn't compete with my job. I of course found this out 1 day before the bomb dropped - so I wasn't able to do anything about it.
Even though my H doesn't really like his job, he makes really good money and therefore can't find another job that would pay like this one.
I told him right off when this whole situation busted loose in July that no job is worth my marriage! I would quit in 2 seconds if I knew it would get him back...but it wouldn't and then I wouldn't be financially stable on my own. This is who I am and what I have worked really hard to become. But I told him that I would change my priorities! I have to for my girls anyway now that he has moved out.
I was really good today! DETACHMENT!!! He came over today to see the girls and when he got there I smiled and said that I had to go hike. He was surprised...said,"are you going with someone?" I just pretended like i didn't hear him and kissed the girls goodbye. Waved to him and smiled and said bye.
All that sounds so good - for you. Allow your H to be in control of his own life. By being such a doer for your H it actually emasculates him. Come up with a comeback line to those people who rub it in to your H what a great catch you are. The guy has no self esteem left! Does anyone compliment him?
I never found creating mystery to help in my sitch, it just made my H angrier about anything he wanted to be angry about.
Do you know your H's LL?
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
