I am reading all of the recent posts and see the same theme of A exposure of the WAS. I am sure that my WAW is dating since she has been on the dating site for so long, but I was going to wait until communication opened up (if ever) to teat the temperature before I went that route. Right now all I am doing is LRT and 180's when I do initiate communication.
At times I feel like I am pi$$ing in the wind and this is all for naught. I hurt my W with my A so why wouldn't my W have her OM now. Then part of me says that we had a good M and if wasn't for me and my paranoia we would still have a strong M.
I am reading a lot of posts with broken hearts the last two days and very few successful DB stories. I guess A or not it depends on the attitudes and transformations of both WAS and LBS and if both can get out of the fog and forgive the transgressions of the other.
I know my WAW did not forgive me for my A 2 years ago. I was too much of a (DA) to apologize (wishing it away) and my W internalized the hurt. Thus, this is where I find myself. The statement about "verify if there is OP (EA/PA) because there almost always is" is also a common theme. As I am sure the reason for the EA/PA was that the WAS did not feel fullfilled by the R. My WAW was tired of me controlling her (and I did), but the main reason and deal breaker for her was my A.
I feel like I am detaching a bit, because right now if my W has OM I really don't care. I know that I have a history with her and bonds that OM does not have. By working on GAL and becoming a better man I can only improve myself and that is all I can ask for in this sitch.
If I ever do communicate with my W and I will one way or another she will see my transformation and if it is meant to be then great! Of course I realize that the old M has been thrown out with the dish water and we will have to work extremely hard to grow and nourish a new M. However, if not, then I am set to have the best R and M with someone else in my future because I have grown a pair since July 4th!
