As always, completelety appropriate thoughs for the situation we both seem to be in.
It reminds me of another bromide "If Bill Gates waited to Windows to be perfect before he released it, we'd still be using DOS"
Gritter, I appreciate the challenges as usual. The fact that I am feeling that they are now NOT stinging me suggests I am doing this for myself.
But I'd like to give you my answers regardless.
Did that boundary exist before you came here?
No. However, I can clearly state is was presumed and it WAS stated directly in mid July when I confronted her.
Your honor, your dignity are YOURS. How did this get taken from you? Will this be restored by YOU gettting a divorce
It can be said that I allowed my honor and dignity (along with my self-respect and confidence) to be trampled upon by NOT setting boundaries and speaking up for myself throughout the marriage. (See NMMNG) Will a divorce restore them? Not as such simply by being divorced but by standing up for myself and exercising my consequences of the boundary of not living in an open marriage (which I have no evidence has changed) then I am beginnning to restore what is mine. If I were to continue to "wait", then I am implicitly accepting this situation. If the A ends, that will change things. But until then...
Where does your honor and your dignity come from? Your honor is the sum of who you are. Your dignity comes from acting on your honor Decide who you are and make decisions based on that. Not reacting to what someone does to you. Do it for your own reasons that are based in your honor.
I believe that is EXACTLY what I am doing. This is still a reaction to what she is doing but not out of spite or revenge. And if she does her own 180, then I'll think about reconsidering my push on the D.
I will NOT be a cuckold or "wear the horns" as illustrated below in the definition of same.
Originally Posted By: Wikipedia
In Portuguese, the terms corno ("horn") and cornudo or chifrudo ("horned") are used to spite or mock the cheated male partner. The expression corno manso ("tame horned") is used to indicate those men who, although cheated by their partners, come to accept it as a fact of their lives. The Spanish word cornudo is used to describe a male partner whose female partner is sexually unfaithful. A consenting cuckold, cabrón, has such an offensive nuance that it is a taboo word rarely used with its original meaning,
