I would challenge you why you thought I was directing it to your choice
I thought that because you are one to point out 'challenges' and ask me to question my motives....as you do above. Let's say I felt "an expectation".
Originally Posted By: Truegritter
...if any (honestly) is to teach W a lesson or to punish. Or even for any expectation of HER behavior or choices at all.
Honestly, if anything, though I am fully prepared for her to 'jump', I am hoping that by seeing the emptiness of the abyss, she pauses to consider her own motives before deciding whether to jump or turn back.
From my perspective, it is the lesser of two evils. By doing nothing and waiting for her to handle the 'hard stuff of the D', I am enabling and solidifying her comfort in the A. Inaction on my part also suggests an acceptance of the situation and a softness to my boundary of NOT living in an open marriage. At least by setting a timeframe/agenda, I am acting on my boundary and leading by example. If this is her decision-and she is free to make it-then other actions are required on her part beyond simply sending me a letter and sleeping with someone else.
Like our M, THIS decision ALSO requires a comittment. A comittment to OM and/or 'the new reality'. And it will also aid me in solidifying my own position regarding my commitment to the M and MY 'new reality'
