This could be a very interesting topic for the two of you to discuss, but put it off for now until you get to Retrouvaille and get the tools to deal with it. This is a relationship talk. So tell her that you hear what she is saying, and you will talk to her about this, but just put it on hold until Retrouvaille. Until then, both of you should try to just be the nice, cooperative sides of yourselves, and get along and spend some time with your son.
This can wait until you have the tools to deal with it. It's like if the roof fell in. Yes, you could get up there and try to fix it yourself, but it wouldn't be watertight, and it might not be level, and you might not put in enough supports. If you get professional help to rebuild the roof, it will come out better and be able to serve it's purpose. Sometimes it is better to wait and get help and do things right.
