True, TH, but those are issues that will be addressed at Retrouvaille, not just at the weekend, but in the six weeks following the weekend. She may need to go to IC to deal with some of her issues too. I think she is trying to bury the ghosts that haunt her by getting a divorce. I don't think the divorce will give her the clean slate she is looking for.
True, TH, but those are issues that will be addressed at Retrouvaille, not just at the weekend, but in the six weeks following the weekend. She may need to go to IC to deal with some of her issues too. I think she is trying to bury the ghosts that haunt her by getting a divorce. I don't think the divorce will give her the clean slate she is looking for.
We're unfortunate that we have to wait 1 month for the follow up meetings. I think there is one CORE meeting in between. We live in a different area than where it is being held and I looked for the next possible Retrouvialle weekend close to us before scheduling because I thought I should strike while we were still in the infancy stages of this.
by the way, it's 13 weeks of Retro followup here, not 6.
W didn't commit to followups. Only the weekend. But from what I hear, most people don't question the followups after going through the weekend.
----"Et tu, Brute?"---- me:28 W:24 S4 T:6 M:4 EA Exposed: 5/21/10 Bomb: 6/20/10 (Father's Day) NC w/ OM: 7/10/10 W moved out 8/21/10 http://bit.ly/aOrZne - My sitch
I think she is trying to bury the ghosts that haunt her by getting a divorce. I don't think the divorce will give her the clean slate she is looking for.
I think that's partly true, Lotus. Probably not the only reason she wants a D, but she has said before, "I just want to move on with my life".
The night she left our home catastrophically, she was absolutely crushed and an emotional mess. She called, and then even I told her I didn't want to talk alot, she chatted me up and said that she was so sorry about the way this all turned out and she regretted the way she treated me, and wished she was a better wife to me.
I'm pretty damned sure those feeling are coming out at Retrouvialle - and in full force.
Last edited by john28; 09/04/1003:37 AM.
----"Et tu, Brute?"---- me:28 W:24 S4 T:6 M:4 EA Exposed: 5/21/10 Bomb: 6/20/10 (Father's Day) NC w/ OM: 7/10/10 W moved out 8/21/10 http://bit.ly/aOrZne - My sitch
The break in between will be hard, but not impossible. They give you homework to do, and there is a website for suggestions of topics to dialogue about. Originally Retrouvaille was just the weekend, but people wanted more to reinforce and build on the work that happened on the weekend, so the Post sessions were developed. Some places meet twice as long on the weekends and do it in half the number of sessions, that's why it is only 6 sessions here. It is the same program everywhere, though.
Don't worry about the emotions coming out at Retrouvaille, there are tissue boxes everywhere! And the priest is available to take confession from those who want it. It is completely optional.
I don't think you have to step in or out if you're going to undress. I'm a think-outside-of-the-box kind of guy. I know I can't be the only one who thought of this
No you aren't. I've got a visual which will get me banned if I wrote about it.
Dropped S4 off this morning at W. She was cold, usually walks me to the door and sees me out. S4 said he wanted to sit on the porch and wave so W had to get up and come outside. Leaving she gave me a hug and said goodbye, ILY. She was just very distant today.
Got a call a few minutes ago from her. Invited me to go with her and S4 to the aquarium today - told her I would really like to see s4, but had already made plans. She said she would talk to S4 and see what he wanted to do.
Called back, said that we should go on Monday. I said that sounded good. She them complained about how she didn't like being on someone's schedule beside hers, and that her car couldn't drive that far (2.5 hours away) because "she has the crappy car". I didn't warrant that with a response.
She asked about my plans today and I told her I was going down to the food bank to volunteer. She didn't say anything to that. Just said goodbye. No ILY.
Going to the food bank today then playing a round of golf. Trying to focus on myself today.
----"Et tu, Brute?"---- me:28 W:24 S4 T:6 M:4 EA Exposed: 5/21/10 Bomb: 6/20/10 (Father's Day) NC w/ OM: 7/10/10 W moved out 8/21/10 http://bit.ly/aOrZne - My sitch
Hey john, Like you I need to focus on myself it's taken some time to get to this point, and listen to the advice from everyone. All are situations are a little different and similar in some aspects, but we will get through it.
