You mean "normal" like before she wanted a divorce?
Yes.
Quote:
Maybe she will notice that he doesn't contact her, then?
Well, if she contacts him and somehow reminds that her birthday passed I would say "Oh, I'm so sorry I did not realize what date it is. I've been a little busy lately."
{quote]At any rate, the poor guy is still beating himself up, so ...?[/quote]
It's calm and sunny after the storm today. Get busy. Go down to the shore and have lobster dinner. Take a boat down the river. Enjoy the day.
That has also been playing in my mind. The celebration of her b-day is a big deal to her. I always bought her a really nice gift, a camera last year parachute jumping the year before. So by not acknowledging her birthday reinforces the fact that I am not there for her anymore. And maybe spark interest in what I am up to...and prompt her to initiate comm....who knows. I am not good at Texas Hold em.
But again with my slim opportunities to reinforce positive feelings towards me. I don't want to lose that opportunity nor do I want to reinforce her negative feelings by not acknowledging her b-day. In my profession I have data to analyze to help make decisions. Here I have a WAW that has not communicated with me for 2 months and no legal action to date and I do not know what to think or do.
I am reading Coach's and Greek's reponses last night to a new poster and advising him not to move out of the bedroom because it only reinforces what the W wants. I am using that analogy here with whether or not I keep the line of communication open.
It's not the same thing. The MBR is partly his, she can't demand of him anymore then he can demand of her to move out. He can make a choice to stay or he can move out. Moving out because it keeps the peace because she will pitch a fit is rewarding bad behavior. Make sense?
1000 watt ideas
- get politically active for fall elections
- sign up for a marathon, tell the world about it
- common denominator among people in prison, no books in their home as a child. organize a book drive and distribute them, teach kids to read if needed. what a gift to give.
- focus on yourself, you shine for you
"A candle gives up nothing to light another."
B-day is easy. send a e-mail that's cheerful, upbeat and professional.
"Running out the door to go to ______________. Wanted to say Happy Birthday. Cheers"
If you have never used "Cheers" before it will perk her ears and eyes. Let her know what is going on in your life very briefly (intomesee). And you get the remembrance in. The less said the better.
You have monkey brain about what to do. Get busy with your hands and body.
Cheers
feels good to say it too.
ps when was the last time you went out dancing?
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Since the weather is better than I thought (stopped watching the news and all I have heard about was Earl) so I will take my boys swimming today. You are right about monkey brains it just feels like I am walking in a minefield that has very few advantages to successfuly navigate through.
Thanks for generating 1000 watt ideas. I thought of another opp FB (I know there are some on this site that hate it), but she has access to my page and maybe when curious she will take a look. Nothing incriminating there as well as keeping updates modest and not too conspicous.
GAL, I read John28 experience in the soup kitchen and I will do some community service. I am checking into acting class becuase that is something that I have thought about in the past and it would be good for both creating that spark and for my career.
Hamlet: Speak the speech, I pray you, as I pronounced it to you, trippingly on the tongue: but if you mouth it, as many of your players do, I had as lief the town-crier spoke my lines. Nor do not saw the air too much with your hand, thus, but use all gently; for in the very torrent, tempest, and, as I may say, the whirlwind of passion, you must acquire and beget a temperance that may give it smoothness. O, it offends me to the soul to hear a robustious periwig-pated fellow tear a passion to tatters, to very rags, to split the ears of the groundlings, who for the most part are capable of nothing but inexplicable dumbshows and noise: I would have such a fellow whipped for o'erdoing Termagant; it out-herods Herod: pray you, avoid it.
I thought of another opp FB (I know there are some on this site that hate it), but she has access to my page and maybe when curious she will take a look.
She's been looking. Add a little mystery on FB.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
This is the 9th Sunday since my wife left me. I have had only 2 emails from her since she left. She joined a dating site two weeks after she left and I noticed today that she has not been on the site for 3 days, which means that there is probably someone else.
I am not sure what I am fighting this for since she obviously detached frome and does not want to have anything to do with me. I know that I hurt her deeply, but I think that I deserve to be treated better than this. So I think I will file this week and cut mt losses.
She joined a dating site two weeks after she left and I noticed today that she has not been on the site for 3 days, which means that there is probably someone else.
Maybe she was contacted by a bunch of creeps and she gave up on that site.
