This is where we've had our disagreements in the past, TG. I just don't agree that this cuts only one way: "It's courageous to stand; you 'haven't done the work' if you don't."
For every one that you can show me who honestly, in their heart, are standing for their marriage after, say, a year or more of cheating from their spouse, I can show you two or three who are doing it out of simple FEAR.
Our community here is not a representative sample of the general population, let's face it. By the time people come here, they've already got marital dysfunction. So we see a LOT of co-dependent, enmeshed people here, and I counsel many, MANY who are simply TERRIFIED of losing their spouse, and who will put up with almost any sort of CB from them so as not to lose them.
