thanks TH. i agree. i do not want to give up anymore info yet. having only found out yest (!!), i limited my approach yest to her saying "something is not right bc lack of intimacy, emotional distancing..." her reply: anger and denial which i know to be a pack of lies. i need a name and particulars. with that i will confront her and out the OM to his W and family/friends. her sister, my MIL? my 15 y/o suspects something too. i am reluctant to let her in on anything bc she is too young, no?
but let the chips fall where they may once i have the info? asking her to leave? that is huge. betw my W and i, she knows i am the breadwinner and she is SAHM. but that is also bone of contention for us @ times bc she says i dont respect her and what she does (which is not true). i help and cook and clean as well when not working. but too much work? not enough talk and feeling and emotion and listening to her which is what my 180s are about. i could not imagine how that will go over. i will hear it about her resentment of me, i am "vindictive," that is why "ILYBNILWY," "i feel the marriage is over and do not wish to be with you" (which she has said more or less), "you need to find someone else...." whew!
but you are sooooo right. i AM in shock. there is a sense of numbness. i know i not alone in feeling this way. there is comfort in knowing there have been others here before me. i can only take hope that i can make it thru for my sake, her sake, our children's sake!!
