Wow, I'm in a crappy mood today, BUT I'm still so glad that fall is upon us. Summer is such a crazy, lawless time of year, and I'm always so happy when the structure and business of fall comes. That doesn't stop me from complaining about it sometimes, but really I do love it.
We're kicking into high gear at work, which is good, but I'm still not all there because of everything with Mr. A. Luckily a lot of my coworkers are still winding down from their summer vacations too, so we're just a tribe of idiots right now. Not to worry - we'll mesh soon enough.
As for Mr. A, I don't know. When we were only seeing each other very rarely, it was easier to DB. I put a lot of thought into each interaction. Now I'm having trouble processing things quickly enough, and so I'm feeling pretty unsettled. Adding to that, of course, is his weird behavior.
BA, you - and everybody else! - advised me to take it slowly with Mr. A. How does that work? And especially how does that work with the complaints I know he has about our marriage?
I'm not being sarcastic, I really mean it. Let's say (this is true) that one of Mr. A's complaints was that I had time for everything but him. Well I look back on it now and say, Yes, I did put other things ahead of time spent with Mr. A. That was a mistake!
So now I want to show that I've recognized that mistake and I won't be like that anymore if we reconcile. But how do I actually show it in a cool and detached way, without acting like we are more committed than we actually are?
