Hi Doodi, I've been reading and I feel for your pain. I can see how confused and hurt you are and I am sorry you got here. I just want to tell you that in my experience, the way I see things at least, any decision you will make in a state of confusion and while the emotions are so intense, will be a decision you will question later.
My advice would be to detach, focus on you, stay away from drama and work towards something that you will be "OK" with... IMHO, you are not in position to make a solid decsiison now, no matter how much he has hurt you in the past.
And, btw, expecting him to "help you" make a decision is not fair. As a LBS, I lived a few horrible months with my H while he had stated he didnt know what he wanted (he was having an A I didnt know about). During those months he was trying to be true to himself (and not with me) resulting to a nightmare for me. I was lost, confused, scared, pathetic, walking on eggshels. I did want to make him stay but all I did was pushing him away. So, in your case, you decision is YOUR job. Dont make it his and "blame him" for not getting things. I can assure you, he isnt capable to. Even if his intention is to change things, you wont be seeing that while he is panicking... If you need distance, you will need to distance yourself, with all consequences (and I think that's exacctly what you should do btw)
Just my 2 cents, hopefully you will understand what I mean... K
