What am I supposed to do???

[TimeHeals]

I don't know the laws about visitation, butyou can't make your H come over to see the kids. It has to be his choice.

Agree. The idea that a judge is going to force him to visit the kids (and you) sounds like a controlling move too, and it's likely to annoy a family court judge.

What the court will do is order child support if you don't already have that.

You have to get out of this tug-of-war with him where he tries to control you, and you try to control him.

Quite frankly, I don't know why you want to have a future with this man based on what you have shared with us, but that is your choice. I do know, however, that efforts to pull him back when he is being this way are doomed efforts, and you should put your energy to use where it matters: protecting your children and you and building a better life for your kids and yourself.