these things work so much better when the backup plan is set into motion way before the bomb, when there is a potential piece on the side, when they don't really know where you are going or what you are doing, when they are analyzing everything you say and do and going back and forth as to whether they should believe it or not.
the other night was the perfect betty crocker with a side of martha. letting her call your bluff then following up with flowers. nice. i would throw in a slice of oprah and take her out for cake.
Let her continue to think she is the cake eater.
Especially if you would have told her sex with you is a mistake.
Luckily I had time to pull my head out before doing further damage.
Originally Posted By: Steve McQueen
Here is how its done. Before you say its time to move on. You have a place to move to and significant cash saved up. These apartments you are surveying should be for you. Two bedrooms and an office over looking the lake. Easy access to downtown and covered parking would be nice too. Realize there is an auditorium full of 'social interactions' waiting right outside your door. Learning how to talk to them will help you realize there is more to an relationship then finding the right counselor. Or realize, "it just doesn't matter."
Crumbs and mystery fruitcake. You should know a lot about those. Leave enough crumbs to let them think they can get control of the situation, but leave them also wondering what day does the cleaning lady come.
Leave them wondering if you are coming or going. He wants to separate. He wants to go to marriage counseling. He wants to separate. He's sending me flowers. What does this mean? What am I doing wrong? If I keep giving him sex will things work out?
Hell, if I've done anything right, it's to thoroughly confuse her. She even said last night that she feels like she's been put through a blender.
Originally Posted By: Steve McQueen
So, you set the back-up plan into motion a little late. It's OK. The piece bumped along a long time before it found the right combination.
You just told her you want separate again. Again.
Again. You must follow through.
She's insistent that she can work on this. That she's trying to make it work. That counseling has been very tough for her, but she feels like she's learning a lot about herself and us.
I've told her I'm not so sure, that she's had her one foot in and the other out the door the entire time. That I need time to think about us and if things can really improve. That "hoping" and "praying" aren't a plan.
I worry about moving out in terms of custody. Everyone tells me that's a bad idea; but I might have to. The sad thing for both of us is that I'm the "strong" one. And y'all know how pathetic that is considering my actions.
