My H sure knows how to disarm me. Yesterday morning I made a little gesture to say "Ok, I'm not HORRIBLY mad at you" - I "liked" his status on FB. But I didn't follow it up with any further reaching out. Today rolls on and nothing else happens... until a few minutes ago.
Back before the fight we made plans to go for a trip that included some workshops we wanted to go to - it was supposed to be a sort of our honeymoon that we didn't have a chance to take earlier.
And I just received an email confirmation of booking for the workshops, which means he just booked them.
Accept that there is only one thing you can change in life and that is you
After a while he sent me an email saying that he booked the workshops for both of us. I waited a while and wrote back saying thank you and that I got the confirmation.
Now I'm torn and confused: If I treat him like a dog and praise him - does that not conflict with acting like a cat and just being moderately interested and pulling away fast? Now that I re-read my email it's rather non emotional and just polite, should I have been more enthusiastic? (the workshops are a really exciting thing!)
I'm starting to think I'm taking these animal models too far...?
Accept that there is only one thing you can change in life and that is you
Oh what I mean is that he went and booked them, which is largely a gesture saying that he still sees us doing the workshops and going for the trip together. So won't he feel that now it's my turn to, say, start a conversation with him or something, as a step on my side?
Accept that there is only one thing you can change in life and that is you
So won't he feel that now it's my turn to, say, start a conversation with him or something, as a step on my side?
What do you want here? OK, so he did the gifts thing to show his affection. Is this pretty much how he always shows his affection? If so, then go buy him something. It doesn't have to be expensive; it just has to be thoughtful. And you can get a card if you want and say, "Thanks for the trip and workshops" (or something better).
Throw Fido a bone And a nice pat on the head is always nice too
Last edited by TimeHeals; 09/01/1001:37 PM.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
He often does show affection that way and actually this is a talk we need to have because my LL is quality time, not gifts. But the trip is something that I wanted a lot so it's beside the issue, he definitely hit the spot there. His LL is words of affirmation / quality time, I haven't figured out between the two but both are high up there.
Accept that there is only one thing you can change in life and that is you
