Good C session. C asked me about the pending D. I said what do you want to know. He said how do you feel about it? I said right now today I accept it, it is what it is. I told him that there is no point in trying to fight it anymore. He asked me if I still wanted to be with her? I said I dont know. I told him that being on my own has been liberating, do i think about her and my family yes, but at the same time I have been more focused on me and what I need to work on.
I told him even if she came to me tomorrow about reconciling, she isnt ready, she hasnt worked on herself one bit. It would go back to everything being my fault and that wont work. My S told me today he wanted me back at home. I again told him Mommy and Daddy are not getting along and that we will have separate houses for a while. He said Mommy wants us to be together. I said again we are not getting along. He is 5 and even he can manipulate, so I just changed the subject about swimming and playing at daddy's new place.
And I had to go to the Dr and get 2 antibiotic shots because of the damn dog bight, it started to get infected and those friggin shots hurt like hell. Not the needle but the burning and muscle aching feeling with the medicine. I told the nurse to leave the room afterthe shots, she said why, I said I want to punch in the face thats why. I was joking of course but I wanted to punch something.
