all I can say is this..when my h finally gave me the ilybnilwy line it was his reasoning for wanting a divorce...my response to him was simply...well I am not "in love" with you either..I just happen to love you.
what is love... what is in love...
I think you pretty much nailed it with in love being that pitter patter feeling...while love is much deeper...sad that so many will shove asside that deep feeling just for a bit of pitter patter (oh crap just realized pitter patter probably isn't the right phrase but you get my drift)
LL who doesn't have time to be too wordy as the pitter patterers in this house are wrestleing me away from the puter as I type.