How should I proceed now? Is there hope?

[NotCrackingUp]

Thanks Kara. I have one question that is burning me up inside. Ultimately, no-one but the man himself can answer it, and even he is so confused and confusing that I doubt he could. it's this: How can you make love regularly and passionately to someone for years, show them affection and desire quite frequently, then suddenly turn it all off and say it was an illusion, it didn't exist? Three days before he dropped the bomb, we were both at home in the afternoon while kids were at school. We ate together, then went about our business. After a while, he came over to me and said he'd lots of work to do but felt like making love. We locked up and went to have our siesta, were interrupted by a neighbour but continued after. This was a reasonably regular occurrence, by the way, but this episode was on Thursday, and on Monday evening, he had no desire for me, was shamming, couldn't live with me anymore. Between Thurs and Sunday, we'd also made love. And with one exception (which he called a "mistake"), he hasn't touched me since, except for this ritual "peck on the cheek" when we meet. This is what's getting to me: he looks through me or won't make eye-contact, recoils from me and behaves with coldness, shows either indifference or irritation with me. All of a sudden, after years of affection and tenderness. I know there was another woman, but that never stopped the closeness. So any experiences or ideas that might explain the overnight freeze and subsequent cold war, leading up to this separation? He no longer texts or phones, just arrives, not always when he's said. I never now initiate communication, and stay quiet when he's here. The sudden utter change and loss of desire/rejection are tearing me to pieces.I can't accept his "shamming" explanation, or he should have won several Oscars. If he was "shamming", he wouldn't have sought me out for intimacy, would he?
NotCrackingUp