I would be shocked if there was OM before she left. From January to May she focused all of her energy with finishing her nursing school and working...I know because I helped write her papers; and from May to June she focused on studying for the NCLEX exam for her nursing license...again I know because I helped with that too. We also went on a two week vacation during that time.
I found out 3 weeks ago that she went to see a IC. I went to the same sIC a week later for myself as well as getting intel. I told the IC the whole story 1.5 hrs of it. She told me as though she knew exactly what my W was saying is that my W is afraid to speak to me because she is afraid to come back for the wrong reasons. I do not know if this is theory or taken from what my W told her.
My W also joined a on-line dating site two weeks after she left me with three plain pictures (a so so picture, her climbing a wall (cannot really see her), and of a tree?) so it is not like she is trying to draw a lot of flies with her profile. But I am sure she is dating. I do not know where she lives or her phone number so intel is not available. Her profile says active within 24hrs. I showed the profile to the IC and she told me that she did this to get me jealous, again as though she knew exactly why my W did it. I joined the dating site the day my W told me that she was leaving me to prompt a response from her, but never put my profile on it...not ready at this time to see anyone.
I recieved one email a "Thank you" for letting her know about her doctors appointment and to let her know of important mail or messages. This was after me going dark for 3 weeks and writing her an email that sort of let her go. Also, a week after she went to see the IC.
I got excited and emailed her two days later and a day after that and day after that. I am sure I pushed her away. So I wrote the letter of apology for the affair and my controlling behavior and told her that I wanted her to be happy so I am letting you go. That email was sent yesterday.
The last conversation we had was the day she left. I begged, pleaded all of the wrong things using a little humor and she just kind of laughed it off saying I was funny. She got quiet and stated with hurt in her eyes "that if I really loved her then why did the OW happen?" So I said "is this the reason that you are leaving?" and she said, YES! I mentioned if she wanted a D and she shock her head yes. I recommended Mediation. As of this date there have been no legal action taken.
