Prepare for a wonderful discovery

[sage]

Well..your last question saves me the time of answering the rest...there IS no ironclad m. I forgot to put that as one of my reasons why I was stymied by my GOALS around it!

I know there are no guarantees. I've read enough stories here to know that infidelity hits m's of all kinds and quality and people and ....

Does that mean that there can't be incremental improvements for me to make in my m that strengthens it? Of course not...that's the goal post that's 10 feet away instead of 500.

And to be perfectly fair...it isn't just about strengthening the m..it's about strengthening me, too because my m (and I) thrive when:

I'm confident
I'm trusting
I'm accepting
I'm without judgement and expectation for h
I'm compassionate
I'm gracious
I'm loving
I'm not driven by fear or insecurity
I'm secure

And those things come from me...yah, it helps to have h DO certain things but that groundedness comes from me.

What do I wish for?

I wish that I felt more secure in being me.
That h knows that he can be him.
That honesty was a fundamental building block of our r.

I still get very stuck at some of the things that seem "purposefully hidden" to me...but maybe that's ASSumption and EXPECTATION and fear.

Sage

sage,

what is an iron clad marriage?
what does such a m look like?
what does such a m include?
what's different about "that" m and your own? is there a difference?
and lastly is there such a thing as and iron clad m?

LL