April 23. I did the common begging/pleading/promising/pursuing to change/crying/etc. mistakes throughout May
that you are still doing this? Again, realize, it is time for something healthy and new.
Tell it to me like a 3rd grader. Which behaviors am I initiating most recently that constitute this (asides from the earlier a$$rubbing, back massaging, footrubbing, tea making)? Are you saying that my responding to her calls essentially constitutes pursuit? That I need to go full blown WAS on her and tell her to leave me alone? That I think I need some time and space to work on myself and figure out who I am and what I want in life?
Originally Posted By: Steve McQueen
The key, and especially in your case, is to allow your wife to find herself. She is begging for it but you give her so many reasons to return to the cook book, frustrated, and try to come up with a new and different way to bake it.
Can you tell me concretely which behaviors on my part do you see as keeping her unable to separate from me? Any rescuing behavior on my part? You suggest, I tell her something like, You know W, I appreciate that you trust me to help you, and I am happy to help you in cases where I think you really need my help. However, I believe in you and think you may be underestimating yourself and can handle this issue just fine on your own. I think I may be better off stepping back and working on myself to give you the time and space to find what you want.
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Me-53 W-49 D22,D18,D15 T-Since-12/2001 Married-9/2004 She Moved Out-5/28/2010 Piecing start-04/2011 Now-together Thread http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2079304
