She is telling you she is NOT attracted to you. She doesn't FEEL it for you.. She doesn't think she wants to feel it for you. There is no PASSION in her soul for you..
AND.. AND.. She is SCARED it isn't there or will EVER be there.. AGAIN.. She is scared out of her mind that it is gone..
Do you have any idea how that must feel to a woman (or any person for that matter) to think they will have to stay with a person who they don't feel love or passion for? Do you have any idea how depressing and lost that person must feel?
And yet, your big worry is to keep pushing and trying to show her how "she can get it back" by doing ______ or doing _____ or by studying this "triangle theory" or by doing this or doing that or saying this or saying that......
YUK.. YUK... YUK...
You do NOT get HER and you don't get IT....
Spinning your wheels unless or until you do understand how to handle this... And it is NOT going to be with counseling her how to get those feelings back..
Things will change when you can finally tell her and mean it... "I get it. You are not attracted to me and don't think you ever will be again. I understand. I wouldn't want to be with a woman I didn't feel the passion for either. I think it would be best for BOTH of us to move on. This won't work. It isn't fair to you to be with a man you feel like you feel for me. I finally get it."
And THEN let her go. THAT is when you will have your chance to get the passion back. and NOT before..
For example go back and read OIN's thread.
One of the things she asked me during counseling was whether I would be patient enough with her while she decided whether she wanted to stay. I told her I was committed to this, even if I got hurt more and more. This was very important to her.
She's also said that she wants that feeling back, but doesn't know how to get it back. She said she likes being around me, but is afraid of me too.
