What am I supposed to do???

[Tay Tay]

I agree with Ris on this one. I don't think him running in and then running out will help at all. Perhaps set a boundary, something like "I want you to be in the kids lives, I want you to see them, however we need to discuss our schedules and set days and times when you will really be able to see them and spend time." I'm not sure if that's how the wording should go, I'm not very good at boundaries yet either.

But I understand how you feel. My H was in my hometown visiting his family, he was here for 15 days, literally 10 minutes from where me and our D live. He saw her 3 times. He did keep her for two nights right before he left, but I'm in the dark as to how much time he actually spent with her during those two nights/days.

I would love to know how to phrase that as a boundary. My husband would come over every Saturday to see the kids. Once I called and talked to the OW and told her what the deal was he stopped coming over for the last 2 weeks. I feel bad for telling her because that has stopped him from seeing the kids. On the other hand I don't feel bad because I was tired of the roller coaster ride with him. The fact is if he wanted to see the kids noone would be able to stop him from seeing them.