The talk seems more targeted for when they're hedging/limbo'ing in your house, not when your separated.
I think it's time for me to let her know she's free - for her sake. And saying it out loud to her will also help me actually do it. I also want to apologize for some things I did in the past in order to move forward.
WAW called me last night regarding an issue with S16. Friends of ours happened to be visiting when she called. I was polite and friendly, but made sure I ended the call first and only discussed that matter she called about and didn't try to keep her on the phone.
I'm feeling a little more each day like I am finally starting to drop the rope. Life is more enjoyable when I am not constantly concerned about what WAW is thinking and doing.
Awesome, BTM. Didn't it feel good to not feel needy, and want to keep her on the phone. I bet you would've acted differently a short time ago. I used to do that, and then someone told me on this bb to always end the call.
Take care.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Awesome, BTM. Didn't it feel good to not feel needy, and want to keep her on the phone. I bet you would've acted differently a short time ago. I used to do that, and then someone told me on this bb to always end the call.
Take care.
It was a good thing friends were over visiting. It gave me a reason to get off the phone quick. The whole call lasted less than 2 minutes.
I'm in BC. I lived in ON about 14 years ago. I like Toronto, although it is somewhat too big for me. I remember the horror of the 401. My H was on business there last week and was rear-ended on that same highway ... ugh!
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
One of my co-workers, who I am good friends with became a father for the first time last night. WAW and I were at his wedding a few years ago.
Anyway..when I found out about the birth of his daughter, I wanted to share that with my WAW. It was all I could do to not call her. I have been doing quite well at detaching recently, but moments like this make me realize that I still have a way to go.
I made a dbing no-no and called WAW a couple days ago. I admitted that I called just to check in. We wound up talking longer than I thought we would. There was some R talk, but I told her I would prefer to discuss that face to face.
Yesterday, WAW showed up at my house unannounced. Kids and I were just about to have tacos for dinner. WAW made dinner for us, visited for a while and then went home. She was here to see S16, but it's been a while since she came to the house at all.
This morning, she called me regarding billing issues with my cell phone. Again, first time she contacted me in a while.
I can view these things as crumbs or baby steps, but at least it appears she is once again getting comfortable being around me and that bodes well for the future regardless of the final outcome.
I forgot to mention that when WAW and I talked on phone that day, she said she wants to make dinner at the house on Sundays again. She also told S16 she couldn't do so this coming Sunday since she is working.
One of my short term goals was to have her get back to coming over on Sundays on her own accord. It looks like that just might happen. It's not much, but it's better than moving the other way.
Today WAW texted me "you and S16 should come for dinner tonight". I ignored. A short time later my son texted about same thing. So, I took him to the restaurant my WAW manages that D19 also works at. WAW hugged me when we left. It sure seems like she is initiating contact lately.
WAW called me twice today. The first time regarding some cell phone billing issues. The second time regarding her latest doctor appointment. I was friendly both times, but not clingy in any way. Both times she asked about Thanksgiving dinner. Again, I acted "as if" it was no big deal, and said "I'm sure the kids would like a home cooked meal". The last week or so, she seems to be initiating contact much more than any other time recently.
