Eric and grit have given you good advice, what I want to add is that we can have NO EXPECTATIONS, however that does not mean that we can not have HOPE. There are lots of stories on this board of people that have saved themselves and saved their marriages. Stories that were much darker than yours, men who left the house 8 different times and cheated with the OW. But now lives in a restored marriage. His wife had faith and hope. You can too. You must start controlling just one person. That person is YOU. Let your W go, get rid of the negative expectations. You can survive this, but YOU are the one to decide that. No one else can control YOU, only YOU.
